Nourish
Beyond the Barre: Take Care of YOU
For years, barre3 Portland client (and mom to Communications Manager Kait) Mary Hurley poured all her energy into her family and her career, rarely taking the time to focus on her own well-being. Then a series of events taught her that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—in fact, it’s the greatest gift you can give your loved ones. Read on to learn about her incredible journey in her own words.
My daughter Kait played basketball in elementary and middle school, and she was always at home on the court. I used to marvel at how, even when she was in a new place with people she didn’t know, she could walk into any gym and feel like she belonged right away. I never had this. Growing up, I went to a private all-girls school where the only sports open to us were intramurals. My focus was purely on academics. I poured everything into my studies, and I worked hard to excel. School was my sport.
When my school days were over, I poured that same energy and passion into my family and my career. My 40s were a blur of working 60 hours a week, taking my four kids to dance lessons and sports practices, and making sure everyone around me was taken care of. I tried to work in exercise—I walked three miles a day with a group of neighbors, and I swam—but like so many people, my motivations were burning calories, losing weight, that kind of thing. It wasn’t a life focused on my own wellness as a real mission.
Then one morning when I was 50 I woke up and thought to myself, what am I doing? Somewhere along the line, I had lost myself. My weight wasn’t where I wanted it, and I didn’t feel healthy. And while it would be easy to claim selflessness—to say I’d been neglecting my needs in order to take care of everyone around me—that wasn’t the problem. My mistake was that I saw regular exercise as an all-or-nothing activity, a luxury I didn’t have time for, rather than something I could (and should) weave into my life.
I knew I needed to shift my priorities, so I made a commitment to exercise and paid attention to what I was eating. I lost 25 pounds and felt like I was on a good path. Then my son Brian, who was in his 20s at the time, was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. The news was utterly devastating and terrifying, and the year that followed was the hardest of my life. But thankfully Brian led a life focused on wellness, and because he was so healthy otherwise—in fact, he had won a marathon just before his diagnosis—the doctors were able to be aggressive with his treatment. He recovered beautifully.
That’s when the true value of good health really crystallized for me. Although I had been exercising for a few months at this point, I felt like I was doing it for myself. Watching Brian go through his treatment, I just remember thinking, what a wonderful gift he gave us with his own good health. I realized that I owed that gift to the people who love me. It was the first time I understood that my own well-being is a gift to others, not just to myself, and it was an absolute awakening for me.
Suddenly, my motivations shifted and I understood that exercise needed to be an integral part of my life, both for myself and for my family. But I also knew I needed something beyond doing sit-ups on the bedroom floor before bedtime, or running on the dreaded treadmill while reading a magazine to distract myself. I needed something that shared my newfound revelation that good health is a gift—and that’s where barre3 came in.
Barre3 is built on the idea that living well isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. That it’s OK to think about yourself and be good to yourself. That the healthier you are, the better you’ll be able to be present for the people in your life. If you’ve taken a class, you may have heard your instructor remind you to take care of YOU. And when they say this, they’re not just talking about your glutes and abs. Barre3 is about building a healthy body, yes, but also about building a healthy self. It’s about growing and learning and understanding yourself and your body. It’s about opening yourself up to the world.
Barre3 has transformed not just my body, but also my entire approach to life. It’s helped me become so much more open to new experiences. Every year, I go to a yoga retreat—something I never would have dreamed of before barre3. I’ve taken breathing and meditation classes. I’ve run races. I have the energy to do more reading, more thinking, and more activities, and it’s all because of barre3.
And best of all, I’ve opened myself up to an entire new community. I think back to Kait’s basketball days, when she was at home any time she walked into a gym. I finally have that with barre3 at 62. Every time I go to a studio—even if it’s in a new city where I don’t know a soul—I’m at home. I joke that barre3 is another entry in my baby book. Each of my four children helped me learn and grow, and barre3 is doing the same thing for me. It has taught me how to take care of ME, and that, I’ve come to learn, is the greatest gift of all.
For years, barre3 Portland client (and mom to Communications Manager Kait) Mary Hurley poured all her energy into her family and her career, rarely taking the time to focus on her own well-being. Then a series of events taught her that taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—in fact, it’s the greatest gift you can give your loved ones. Read on to learn about her incredible journey in her own words.
My daughter Kait played basketball in elementary and middle school, and she was always at home on the court. I used to marvel at how, even when she was in a new place with people she didn’t know, she could walk into any gym and feel like she belonged right away. I never had this. Growing up, I went to a private all-girls school where the only sports open to us were intramurals. My focus was purely on academics. I poured everything into my studies, and I worked hard to excel. School was my sport.
When my school days were over, I poured that same energy and passion into my family and my career. My 40s were a blur of working 60 hours a week, taking my four kids to dance lessons and sports practices, and making sure everyone around me was taken care of. I tried to work in exercise—I walked three miles a day with a group of neighbors, and I swam—but like so many people, my motivations were burning calories, losing weight, that kind of thing. It wasn’t a life focused on my own wellness as a real mission.
Then one morning when I was 50 I woke up and thought to myself, what am I doing? Somewhere along the line, I had lost myself. My weight wasn’t where I wanted it, and I didn’t feel healthy. And while it would be easy to claim selflessness—to say I’d been neglecting my needs in order to take care of everyone around me—that wasn’t the problem. My mistake was that I saw regular exercise as an all-or-nothing activity, a luxury I didn’t have time for, rather than something I could (and should) weave into my life.
I knew I needed to shift my priorities, so I made a commitment to exercise and paid attention to what I was eating. I lost 25 pounds and felt like I was on a good path. Then my son Brian, who was in his 20s at the time, was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. The news was utterly devastating and terrifying, and the year that followed was the hardest of my life. But thankfully Brian led a life focused on wellness, and because he was so healthy otherwise—in fact, he had won a marathon just before his diagnosis—the doctors were able to be aggressive with his treatment. He recovered beautifully.
That’s when the true value of good health really crystallized for me. Although I had been exercising for a few months at this point, I felt like I was doing it for myself. Watching Brian go through his treatment, I just remember thinking, what a wonderful gift he gave us with his own good health. I realized that I owed that gift to the people who love me. It was the first time I understood that my own well-being is a gift to others, not just to myself, and it was an absolute awakening for me.
Suddenly, my motivations shifted and I understood that exercise needed to be an integral part of my life, both for myself and for my family. But I also knew I needed something beyond doing sit-ups on the bedroom floor before bedtime, or running on the dreaded treadmill while reading a magazine to distract myself. I needed something that shared my newfound revelation that good health is a gift—and that’s where barre3 came in.
Barre3 is built on the idea that living well isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. That it’s OK to think about yourself and be good to yourself. That the healthier you are, the better you’ll be able to be present for the people in your life. If you’ve taken a class, you may have heard your instructor remind you to take care of YOU. And when they say this, they’re not just talking about your glutes and abs. Barre3 is about building a healthy body, yes, but also about building a healthy self. It’s about growing and learning and understanding yourself and your body. It’s about opening yourself up to the world.
Barre3 has transformed not just my body, but also my entire approach to life. It’s helped me become so much more open to new experiences. Every year, I go to a yoga retreat—something I never would have dreamed of before barre3. I’ve taken breathing and meditation classes. I’ve run races. I have the energy to do more reading, more thinking, and more activities, and it’s all because of barre3.
And best of all, I’ve opened myself up to an entire new community. I think back to Kait’s basketball days, when she was at home any time she walked into a gym. I finally have that with barre3 at 62. Every time I go to a studio—even if it’s in a new city where I don’t know a soul—I’m at home. I joke that barre3 is another entry in my baby book. Each of my four children helped me learn and grow, and barre3 is doing the same thing for me. It has taught me how to take care of ME, and that, I’ve come to learn, is the greatest gift of all.
